Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Baby Imann Birth Story ....From Mummy Peed point of view as a Doula.


To begin with, Wahida is my bestfriend since we were in MRSM Muadzam Shah. She is bubbly, friendly, intelligent, and a determined person. When she found out and told me that she was pregnant, not once I implanted the idea of homebirthing. But I did introduce her to the idea of gentle birth.

It was she who initiated the first step to read through the birth stories in the Hypnobirthing website. From there, she asked me about my experience and (I think) she was sold with the idea. Plus, her husband was first decided to homebirth ans was far  more confident as compared to her. After that, I advised her to enroll for childbirth class, and they decided to sign up for Maria Zain’s AMANI Childbirth preparation class.

Baby Imann Birth Day!

What an interesting day it was.. It was May 5th,2013 our 13th General Election Day. I received a call from Wahida at about 3 pm just after I went to cast my vote. She just informed me that she had her birth show around 1 p.m and that the surges were still mild and there was some amniotic fluid leaked after that. I just reminded her to keep herself hydrated and eat vitamin C if she has any.  I told her that when I birthed Ifwan, I got my blood show at about lunch hour and I birthed the next day. For that reason, I was kind of forget the fact that each labour is different for a while (and I forget that she was in labour until it was about 7 -8 o clock). I sent her an SMS asking how she’s doing, and the the progress of the labour and there was no reply. So, I thought she can still handle it herself. Not long after that, around 9.30 p.m ( I was just arrived in TESCO Kajang to shop for grocery) Nik (the husband) called me telling that the wife was having strong intense labour, started after Maghrib prayer. I asked if she has tried the birth ball, she did but now the birth ball no longer gave her any relief and she has jumped in the pool. Nik asked if I had any word to give her, and I said “ Please tell her not to fight the sensation because that what makes it unbearable”.

My husband asked me who called. “ It’s Nik. Yda’s husband.” I answered. “Why? Is she in labour?” he asked. “Yes. Nik said that she cannot tahan any more with birth ball and she has jumped in the pool already” I explained. “ Then, let’s just go there.” He decided. “ Tak jadi beli grocery?” I asked. “Nanti-nanti lah. Maybe she is in need of emotional support right now” said my husband. On the way to her place, my husband asked me “Do you think she wants you to be there? I mean, ya laa, like you, Masik (my sister) next door pun, you don’t want to call.” . “ That was me, at that moment I just didn’t want any other person in the room. But I think, she wanted me to be around kot, because she updated me when she had the show. Plus, Nik sounds a bit panic”

We arrived at around 10.50 p.m. and Nik left the front door unlocked. So I entered the house straight to the room with my one year old Ifwan Ariff.  I saw Wahida was already doing great. She was on all fours working with the surges. At that moment, she couldn’t really talk so I only talked to Nik for the update and the progress so far. I let my baby to stand by the pool. He stood there and not long after that he cried. Maybe he was sleepy. I fed him to sleep and the host let Ifwan sleep in another room. Thank you Allah for making things easier.  My Alya was asleep downstairs with my husband watching the results for PRU 13 on the TV. I went out of the room where my baby slept and saw Nik was feeding her wife and I left both of them in the room alone, and went downstairs to join my husband watching the TV.

Later, Nik came down and joined us for a while. While we were chatting and made commentaries on the PRU 13 results, we heard Wahida calling for her husband. Nik ran upstairs to the room. I followed. When I entered the room, Nik already held the baby’s head. Wahida was in position half kneeling, and another leg was almost straight. The baby’s shoulder was earthside already. I heard this brave mummy greeted the baby “Assalamualaikum, Imann!”. We waited for about 2 minutes or so before I gave suggestion to stand up. She agreed. So I helped her to stand up and the baby slides to her father. “ Alhamdulillah !! Good girl!!” Nik praised her wife. Immediately after that, he recited Azan to his son. It was so unfortunate for this doula because I failed to capture this precious moment when Imann made his Grand Entrance earthside because I couldn’t find my phone. I only found my phone when I help her to stand up.After that, I asked her if she wanted to rest on the bed, and she said yes, she would love to. Only then we could chat like old friends, comparing experience and all. But one thing that I was really glad to hear was that, she was not at all feel any trauma and she is not afraid of another childbirth. That is priceless!!! Both mummy and baby enjoyed each other company together while the father cleaning up the birth scene. I helped them to capture the moment, taking photos and recording video.

When the baby started breastfeeding, Mummy started to feel the surges again. To make the mother comfortable, I suggested Nik to support Wahida from the back, so she can lie back on him comfortably.  While she enjoyed her surges,  I passed them the drink so she can have a sip or two , as the husband could not move anymore.

After 2 hour of surges, I started to SMS and FB message to Maria and Wai Han for assistance (around 1.40 a.m). I knew that there’s a record of 14 hour for the plassi to birth, but the Mummy wanted to get it done as soon as possible. So, I asked both Maria and Wai Han if they have any suggestion to speed up the birth of the plassi. I was so afraid that it would be disturbing to send SMS to people at odd hours. But to my surprise, Wai Han replied almost immediately, “Cough it out”. “Ok yda, try to cough it out” I said. “ I couldn’t really cough, but I’ll try to do what I can”. She was sort of clearing her throat. She made it quite a few times. Then another SMS came in from Wai Han “Drink raspberry leaf tea to strengthen surge.”  That made me paused quite some time thinking how in the world I can get RLT in the middle of the night. Then I just ask Yda if she has any. And she said yes, she had it.  Thank you Allah for making things easier. I ran downstairs and get the tea. So I made the tea. And another SMS came in from Wai Han “Tried to sit on toilet bowl?” and “During surge, can try pull gently”. “Currently, she’s kneeling..” I replied.

“Yda, do you want to try sit on the toilet bowl?” I asked. “That’s what I thought too.” she said. So I offered to hold the baby, and asked Nik to help assist Yda to the toilet. I talked to the baby, “ Baby Imann, could you please ask your friend to come out??”  Dont know if that work, but I just tried asking the baby to take part. We waited quite a long time in the toilet. She continuously clear her throat, drink the tea until I saw the part of the plassi at the opening. Only then, I tried cord traction to get the plassi out. Yda said that she barely feel the surge anymore. I decided to pull the cord harder than the first attempt ( as I assumed that the plassi was detached already). Third time is a charm. My third attempt to pull the plassi out was successful. The plassi came out in a whole. “Alhamdulillah!!” . All of us were really glad that it was all over and everything went smoothly.

Later, Yda get herself cleaned and I asked Nik to help Yda to settle down, while I held the baby in the toilet. While waiting the parents to settle down, I open the pipe and wash away all the blood clot in the toilet. After she settled down, I helped them to clean the baby as he had passed out the meconium. Just before that, Nik tied the baby’s umbilical cord  with some floss and cut the cord using sterilized scissors. After getting the baby cleaned and swaddled, I asked  permission to go home at about 3.15 a.m. That’s the story from my side.

Above all, thank you Allah for make everything easier. Thank you Soo Wai Han for still replying my SMS in the odd hours. And thank you to both Yda and Nik for inviting me to witness and share this beautiful experience of yours.


Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Baby Ifwan Ariff Homebirth




Ifwan Ariff b Luqman Hakim : Fresh from the oven..





Bismillahirrahmaninrrahim..In the name of Allah the Most Gracious...

Before I start, I hope that those who chose to read this are open minded and be able to read it without being judgmental. Those who read this story are hoped to have a positive attitude and know how to respect the choice I have made.  This story is written to remind myself in the future of how I am blessed to have a better in fact the best experience so far in my life. Caution: This entry/story is going to be a very loooonnnggggg one (and might be boring to your reading).

Introduction

To begin with, my first birth wasn’t something I would like to go through again ( and again...) . It was not that bad but I promised myself that I refused to have the same experience in the future (if I got pregnant again). I even asked my husband not to have another baby due to the “not so beautiful” experience. But my husband’s simple answer “Why don’t you ask me in 3 years time?”.  I thought I read enough information about Childbirth before I walked into the Labour Room , but unfortunately I did not. Looking back at the experience, my first childbirth experience was full of unnecessary medical interventions ( Foleys tube, lots of VE, Artificial Rupture of Membrane, Episiotomy and stitches) and I think I was lucky enough that I did not end up with C-section.

As a result, I was so afraid to get pregnant again. I have read before about Hypnobirthing but I didn't know that here in Malaysia, we already have it. After I ventured into Motherhood, I always chat with one of my TESL friend, Najwa. I always consult her about breastfeeding, I remembered once asked her about Hypnobirthing , if she has any information about it. One fine day, she posted  a link on my wall about Hypnobirthing class that will be conducted by one of her friends. Eventhough I was not pregnant, I was very interested to join the class. When I asked my husband if he could join me to the class, he said ok. So, I signed up. That is how I came to know my Hypnobirthing instructor, Nadine Ghows. 

Post Hypnobirthing

I was still not pregnant but at that moment I was so hopeful that I could get pregnant soon. I guess the classes had made me overcome my fear of childbirth. It helped me understand my own anatomy and physiology better. I understand the power of human mind, mind setting, determination and faith. A few months later, I found out that I had bun in the oven! I was quite excited. The moment I found out about the pregnancy, I set my mind to have a homebirth. My husband was not so keen to the idea at first but towards the end of my pregnancy, he showed his support by joining me to the Birth Buddies Meet Up, surveyed and bought a pool for the event ( because at first I wanted to have a waterbirth), and pumped the pool once the baby was in head down position ( in week 35 or so) . That was enough for me to know that he’s into the plan.

Baby Ifwan's Birth Chronology

I experienced mild surges ever since I was in week 34 - 35. The surges were not really noticable as I could still ignore it and do my work as usual. On 29th April 2012, I started to feel some of the surges when they came as they came with sensations. But my instict told me that it was still not time yet. In the next 3 days I experienced Prodromal Labor (to my assumption as there was no show nor mucous plug). So, on 2nd May, 2012 I went to work as usual because if I were left alone in the house, there will be nobody to accompany me and I will have to look after my first born while  handling the surges at the same time. During lunch time, there was quite a long surge that I have to stop talking when it came. After the surge, I felt something came out so I decided to check what it was. It was the mucous plug. So, I informed my husband, and my sister, and Najwa. I called my mother asking how long did she have to wait until the  baby came out after she had her birth show. Reason why I asked was because mine might be like hers. I informed my colleagues about the show and I told them even if I dont give birth the next day, I will start to take leave. They started to panic asking if I wanted them to send me to the hospital. But, I still feel I could handle it.

My sister fetched me and took me home. Upon arrival, I cleaned up my kitchen, the living room and took all the necessary things to my bedroom upstairs, in case I birth before I could come down again. I took hot shower and it felt nice. But, after that I can hardly feel the surges. The surges were not as intense as the one I had in the afternoon. My husband came home at about 4.30 p.m. My parents arrived around 5 p.m. My husband rearranged the room so that the pool can be put right in front of the bathroom, so it would be easier for him later to fill up the pool, since the pool was quite big ( 2 mtr x 1.5 mtr more or less).After dinner, I started to feel the surges again. Still not that intense, I started to wonder if the thing that I saw in the afternoon was " the show". So, after I got my daughter to sleep, I had another strong surge and I went to the toilet to check. This time around I knew it was the show. I wore the maternity pad in case there'll be amniotic fluid leak or any other discharge. Then I informed Nadine about it. Najwa also  keep on sending me messages asking me how am I doing (Thank you, darling!). I decided to get some sleep as I want to conserve my energy in case the the baby decided to come out the next morning. 

At 4.00 a.m, I was awaken by a strong surge. I woke up and I went downstairs to get myself a mug  of hot milo and oats. While sipping the hot Milo, I thought of timing my surges. So, I timed. They were like 7 - 8 minutes apart. After that, I started to sit and bounce on my ball. I bounced and bounced as I felt very comfortable.  At around 4.45 am, I went to toilet, my body was cleansing itself. After that, the surges came and the interval between the surges shortened. The intensity of each surges became stronger. I made some noise while bouncing on the ball. It felt really good. I tried to distract my mind from the sensation thinking of something pleasurable and it worked!! The sensation became the thought that I was thinking. My 3rd sister, Anisah whom was in Malacca started to send me SMS asking how am I doing. She could not sleep that night. She asked me to visualise. 

At approximately 6.30 a.m. , as the intensity became a lot stronger that I could hardly distract my mind, I woke my husband up. I asked him to sit in front of my birth ball. Being himself, he didn't really know what to do eventhough he went to the Hypnobirthing class with me. He just listened to my instructions and at that time that was good enough for me. As long as he was there with me. My daughter also woke up for her feeding. Since the lights was on, she did not continue her beauty sleep. Each time the surge came, I hugged my husband while bouncing on the ball. At least the smell of him did lessen the sensation this time. That trick worked for me. At times, my daughter (who loves attention) was crying to get my attention. I was so focused on the surges and when it came I could not give her the attention she needed.  When I felt like I could walk, I decided to  take a hot shower. So I went to take hot shower. It was 7.00 a.m. I adjusted the temperature to the hottest I could manage and I put the hot shower on my back and at my lower abdomen, back and forth. It was a relief!! One more thing that I noticed, my water broke while I was having the hot shower. The colour did not worry me.

 At 7.40 a.m ( yes, I took a 40-minute shower) , I came out and a few minutes after that, my husband took my daughter downstairs to my parents, and since my daughter was not around, I climbed on the bed trying to get some sleep. But, as soon as I put myself on the bed, a very strong surge came and I felt  I needed to get out of the bed. With the same surge, I felt like my cervix has fully dilated as I felt the baby descended into my cervix. I knew the baby was about to come out. But my husband was downstairs. I was panicked for a while. A few seconds later, my husband came in, and  I told him that the baby was about to make his grand entrance. He thought he could still fill up the pool with water and I said there's no more time to fill up the pool. I asked him to hug me and he lead me into the dry pool. The time was about 8.00 a.m. and I tried to be on all four, but it did not do me any good. I kneeled widely and it felt right. In front of me, my husband who was waiting , ready to be instructed. I did not give out any instructions. I just need him to be there to be hugged (he is my bantal busuk after all :)). So, I hugged him. With the next surges, I felt like pushing the baby out, but I focused on my breathing and wasted my energy else where with vocalisation. I told myself many times "my aim is no tear!! DON'T PUSH!!!". I made a lot of sounds. I just did not care how funny it sounded. I made sure to let my jaw loose at all time. My poo came out first. "Poo is a good sign!!" I said to myself. But, at the same time I was like "Alamak!! terberak!! nasib baik takde air.." .  So, my hubby really has to succumb with it. At the same time, I tracked where my baby and suddenly I felt the baby was crowning.  I changed my location as I did not want my baby to land on the poop, of course. I did not use any mirror, I did not touch "the area". Everything was told by my instinct. I was talking to myself " So, this is how the " ring of fire" feels like...If this is it, I can handle it..".  At the same time, I encouraged my baby too. " OK. Good job, baby!!" "Good boy!!"    "OK, Pandai!!", "sikit je lagi, baby", things like that.  Suddenly my hubby and I heard something just dropped and IT WAS THE BABY.  I was not sure which position he came out, be it anterior or posterior, because at that moment, it really didn't matter to me anymore. He landed safely on the dry pool and I know it, there was NO TEAR!!  It was 8.10 a.m.

As soon as the baby was out, my husband got out of the pool and went downstairs informing everyone that the baby has been born safely. My 5th sister, Pip, whom stay with me in the same house came into the room ( her room was just next door!!), followed by my mother with my daughter. My father was out to buy some breakfast. The moment my sister came in, I was about to pick my precious boy. As I picked him up he cried. It was music to my ears. My sister helped me arranging the pillows for me to lay my back. I put the baby on my chest and now I am just waiting for the placenta to come out.

The Birth of the Placenta

Meanwhile, I just relaxed after the hard work I just did. In my heart, I felt accomplished, happy, tired, grateful, blessed and sleepy all at the same time. My sister started to inform my other siblings. For the first 10 - 15 minutes the baby rested on my chest before he started to look for FOOD!! He must be hungry after all the hardwork too! So, I did some circular massage on my breast until I saw something came out. He latched on successfully and started to breastfeed for the first time in his life. Once he started to suck, I started to feel some surges. While, the baby was breastfeeding, my husband recited the Azan and Iqamah to his ears.And the surges came back to birth the placenta. I tried to breath it out with each surge. Maybe it was due to the position I was in. I tried to do some circular massage on my lower abdomen, the same way I remembered the Housemen Officer did to me 2 years ago. I traced the umbilical cord to my VJJ, there was something at the end of the cord. I asked my sister what did it look like?? Does it look like blood or meat?? She said it looked like meat. OK. I knew it was the placenta. I tried to breath it out again. Not successful. I decided to change position to the position I birthed the baby.  I put the baby on the pillow and  I kneeled again . I called my husband to be my teddy bear again. With the next surge, I successfully breathed the plassi out!! And immediately I praised Allah "Alhamdulillah!". It was about 1 hour after the baby was out.

Immediately after that, I asked my sister and my husband to help me take bath. As soon as I got out of the pool, I passed out less than 1 minute and my sister lead me to the bathroom and held me, and my husband washed away all the blood. The umbilical cord was cut by my Dear Husband, when he wanted to clean the baby because the baby has passed out the meconium. After that, the baby was given to me again and I breastfed him to sleep. 

Lesson Learnt

This journey has completely changed my view towards childbirth. I embrace the fact  that birth is a natural process not a medical event. This is the childbirth that I always imagined in my mind. A private birth with only the persons who really support me and no unnecessary medical interventions. To those who think I had blindly jump into this matter, you are wrong. I made my effort attending classes even before I conceived, I did my research, I know the possible consequences ( all the "what ifs", the worst case scenario ) and ways to overcome it and I do have my back up plan. I went to my regular check up especially towards the end of my pregnancy.  I did my own assessment whether I am fit/ able to handle the situation.  I learned how to trust my own body and I listened to the signals it sent me. Above all, I learn how to completely surrender myself and have faith to what has been written for me by Allah The Almighty. It doesn't matter where I chose to birth my baby, hospital or at home :-  if He wants me to live, I shall live, vice versa. I believe that Allah won't burden me with things that I cannot handle. All in all, this experience taught me to be more humble.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

feeling like ....

it's official then that i have a hot bun in the oven. the sickness so far is manageable, compared to the time when i was pregnant with miss chubby cheek alya humaira... the nausea is shared with en. luqman hakim too..that is the best part. at least now he has some clue of how fatigue i was when alya was in my tummy.

i found out that there's a bun in the making last 2 weeks. still excited n anxious for the 2nd one.. i didnt announce it in facebook because it is too early. at least 7 week. the symptoms are very clear, extreme fatigue, cepat lapar ...and nausea, other than feeling feverish a few times a day.....quite a numbers of times i dont feel like going to work.... i still have no energy even after a short nap...

yes..i do need something sour to kill/ beat the taste in my throat.. i pray that everything goes well for this pregnancy... insyallah....

Friday, August 19, 2011

i just get inspired...

omg... i just get inspired by this website..siap laa baju encik luqmanhakim saye kerje kan nnt,....!!!

Thursday, July 14, 2011

just another class...




yesterday, i went into my colleague's class. she was not around for some reason. the story is about the class that i went into.

as usual, i took the attendance followed by a lecture about jobs n occupation. bla..bla..bla...then i gave them some exercise about job..not really an exercise..just some puzzles..
after they completed that n discussed the answer, i give them some vocab exercise to look for synonyms, antonyms and whatnot.....for this exercise, i expected them to use the dictionary...

since i didnt see any of them use it, i blurted a question ...

me : did u guys have any idea of an invention that has been called as dictionary???
ss : owh, teacher..we are advanced!! all we have to do is just click-click-click and we got the answers...
me : ok, but i still think u need one...
ss : tak payah penat2 selak2 teacher....telefon kan dah canggih2...
me : owh...ye??? ni semua duk harap dengan encik google laa nih ....ok, fine! i just cant wait to know your answers.


when we discuss the answer, they had to look for a meaning for "CONFIDENTIALITY"... yeah, such an easy word. but these students arent as bright as MRSM nor University..
when asked them to give the answer for that particular word, most of the students eagerly gave the answer "see CONFIDE"

me?? rase nak pengsan tergelak!

ni laa masa aku bebel kan depa nih..biaq pi laa hang bukan student aku ka hapa ka... " haa...tu lah dia!! percaya sangat dengan encik google kan??? see confide yer????lain kali kalo die tulis see confide OR any other words...what you should do is , click the word to look for the meaning..jangan amik bulat2...tu lah!! dah ade teknologi ..belagak dengan teknologi.... tapi tak reti nak gune!! abes tu kalau awak tulis situ SEE CONFIDE tu, awk expect saya nak see macam mana???buleh saye click dlm buku awk ke???"

owh ye... pardon me... if i nag them in english, they dont even understand..and the message wont go across...

Tinggal Kenangan...


(pic googled)

When i was small ( kindie), i remembered i have been taught to sing this song.. at that moment, it was just another song to me. it doesn't give me any meaning nor deep interpretations . now that i have grown up ( and been through a LOT of Literature class), i started to 'listen' to the message(s) it conveyed. with the scenario that we have in Malaysia, it really reminds me back to this 'old song'....

Anak kecil main api,
Terbakar hatinya yang sepi,
Air mata darah bercampur keringat,
Bumi dipijak milik orang.

Nenek moyang kaya raya,
Tergadai seluruh harta benda,
Akibat SENGKETA sesamalah KITA,
Cinta lenyap di arus zaman.

Indahnya bumi kita ini,
Warisan berkurun lamanya,
Hasil mengalir ke tangan yang lain,
Peribumi merintih sendiri.

Masa depan sungguh kelam,
Kerana peristiwa semalam,
Tertutup hati, terkunci mati,
Maruah peribadi sudah hilang.

Kini kita cuma tinggal kuasa,
Yang akan menentukan bangsa,
Bersatu lah hati, bersama berbakti,
Pulih kembali harga diri.

Kita sudah tiada masa,
Bangun lah dengan gagah perkasa,
Jangan lah terlalai , teruskan usaha,
Melayu kan gagah di nusantara.



mode: mixed emotion


Thursday, July 7, 2011

New me...

It has been a very long time since my last post here.... ever since my last pregnancy... child birth?? not really a bad experience... the more i look back at it in my memory, less and less fear i feel about child birth... but i admit that i was a person with lack information that has walked into that phase of life..i thought i gained enough knowledge about it.. but now if i were to go through it again, i think i am going to be more prepared than before..

i just finished attending a 5-class Hypnobirthing course with Nadine and i am already had a birthing "dream" of my own. If i were to get pregnant again (and again), i want it to be an ORGASMIC one(s)!!! Orgasmic..that sounds interesting, kan??? My birthing Dream are (wahhh!!! excited semacam je kan??) as follows:
  1. I want to do it at the comfort of my home.... (gile tak?)
  2. I want my dearest to be by my side....
  3. I want to have a water birth...
  4. I want no intervention at all....all natural....
  5. I want to see my baby first breast crawl, while enjoying the cocktail of hormones....
  6. ...
I am going to add the dreams bits by bits..... and dont forget to follow this blog for a good read on birthing .....i purposely add it here so that i can find it later....very informative...

list of things that i should read when i get pregnant later ... (will be added from time to time)
1)

eventhough i already have my own birthing dream, as of this moment , i am not pregnant pun.... wahahahaha....

Friday, January 29, 2010

Story plus plus (cerita campur-campur)

Hmmm...hello...!!!!! it’s Friday .... yeah2 i know that i have neglected this blog for a very long time.... it’s not that i don’t have things to write ...but i was kind of busy. If i were not busy then i was not in the mood to write (haha..blame the pregnancy and the baby now ,eh?) mood swing laa katekan.... Now, is the time for you to be prepared for a very long entry..

About the pregnancy, now i have completed 34 weeks already and i’m in my 35th week. The last 3 months were way too fast and my belly is like a huge balloon already.. i have trouble sleeping at night also.. at this point of pregnancy, i should be getting a lot of rest but when the baby jumps around, i could not sleep at all, plus the times that i have to wake up in the middle of the night to pay a visit or two to the bathroom.. however, i have to admit it that i love the feeling when the baby is moving inside.... it’s like when i feel like i’m alone, the baby reminds me that i’m not alone at all.... i wonder how my life is going to be like in about 1 month when this little precious shows up... A friend of mine whom wife’s due date is about the same with mine has felt the contraction already, and the contraction is 10 minutes apart. The wife has started to dilate already...and i’m started to feel scared....

Most of you might be guessing that i’m scared of the labour.... that too, but most of it is because i am worried that i could not settle my work before i go into labour... with the students’ assignments, presentation...before i handover my classes to the other colleagues... at least for the EUE codes that i teach, there are only 1 assignment and 2 presentations.... but for the TUE code (that has just been revamped...my oh my...) the are 3 presentations, scrap book, and 3 listening tests... sempat ke mcm nih????? Tak sanggup nk pikir... plus, my name is selected to be observed for internal observation by my KJ.... ini adlh 1 kegilaan!!! But if i am currently trying to take it positively...i work best under pressure (repeat 100 times)... what i do now to make sure that the students submit the assignments on time is to ask them to do the assignment in class.. so there will be no excuse for them to finish it late....if my EDD is happened to be accurate, i have exactly 1 month..for the month of February, i’ll have them submit the assignment during the first week. And have the presentation by the second week.. (that is applicable for my sem 1 EUE students only) not for sem 2...they are going to start the assignment during the first week, by the second week the assignment should have been submitted to me and by the third week, they should be ready with the presentation....so, i have 1 week spare to evaluate the assignment... That would happen IF my EDD is accurate... if it happen to be later than that, i’d be grateful as i am given extra time to finish it all, but i just cannot imagine if THE DAY comes earlier than expected???? GOSH!!!!!!! (this time it’s not the baby’s fault!! It’s just about the timing.. why did mummy and daddy get married in June??????why????...Damn!!!!hahaha...)

Early of this month, i went to Sabah for a vacation with my in-laws.. it was a great one ...and i enjoyed it very much... can u imagine this pregnant lady climb up the hill just to walk on the canopy walk???? Hahaha..tak sedar diri btol kan??? Terrer tau...tp mase tu ade jgk terpikir, what if i terberanak plakkkk time tgh atas jambatan gantung tuh??? But..the hell with it...dah la the emergency bag was left in Bangi at that time...hahaha... takpe, mase tu baru 7 bln, insyallah tak kotttt... the places we visited in Sabah were KK (of course laa..) , Kinabalu Park, Poring Hot Spring, Kundasang and Manukan Island ..and 1 more place Monsopiad Cultural Village....

On the day of arrival, we went around Kota Kinabalu ( Salted-fish market, Filipino market and the market next to it... just to warm up and survey for the souvenirs that match our budget (hehehe...al maklum laa, sengkek..tp nk g jalan jugak). The next day, we went on a trip to Kinabalu Park, Kundasang, and Poring Hot Spring.... it was a very long and tiring journey as we have to passed by jalan yang amat laaaa berbukit... (now that bukit putus and bukit tangga are no longer like that..i’m soo not used to it anymore) for more than 4 hours pergi balik...and on our way back, the fuel was almost empty and my husband (as the official driver) has to play a lot with the braking system (instead of low gear) to ensure less fuel consumption though as an engineer ( car especially), he knew that it was a very dangerous thing to do (using a lot of brake- that is the reason why near Jelapang Toll in Ipoh tu, there were lots of accident due to Braking system malfunctioned... people tend to use brake instead of using low gears )...tu laa..kat Ranau tu tak mo isi minyakk... Luckily we made it to Tamparuli safely and refuel the car....

On the third day, in the morning my husband and i went to the fish market. I went there just to see the fresh seafood that ppl always talk about...and, actually i was in a mission to look for lobster, we saw it at the main entrance, tp org punye laa...after that, we went to Manukan Island...jalan2 kat pulau... the beach was extremely beautiful.... and the water was clear too, we could see the fish swimming... after we got back to KK, we went to the markets that sell salted fish n souvenirs and do some shopping...

On the last day, my husband and i woke up as early as 530 am and we have a mission!!! We want to go to the fish market to buy lobster!!!!! Hahaha....nak jugak! So, we went to the market together with my parents in law.. so, jalan punye jalan, punye jalan... then i stopped at a fish monger ..terkesima melihat 1 spesis udang yg amat besar!! As big as my nephew punye lengan... (note: lengan Amir hakim adlh amat besar dan lazat utk di gigit!!) I asked for the price, and he replied it’s RM 20 per kg...wahh!!! so, on the table there were 6 of it...3 big ones and 3 not so big but as big as the biggest udang galah we could find in semenanjung.... so, can u imagine how big are the big ones??? At first, i asked the fish monger to weigh oneof the big prawns...( we thought it was lobster but after buying it we still didn’t know whether it is really a lobster or not...) but, after found out that it only weigh 300g, we asked the seller to timbang sumer2 tuh laaa...wahahahahha..puas ati aku!! Altogether RM 38. Balik rumah dgn muke amat puas ati, tp sampai umh tanye kak ilah dulu whether binatang tersebut adlh lobster atau tak... This is because my brother n my sister in law were once in somehow almost similar situation (almaklum laa kami nih sume tak pnah jumpe @ mkn en mohd lobster nih) haha... so, kak ilah pon tgk laa binatang dlm plastic tu...lobster laa tuh! YES!!!!! Lps tu kami terus masukkan binatang tu dlm freezer (utk di bawak balik)..

(to be continued).......

Monday, October 26, 2009

20 down...20 more to go..!!!!

now i am already in my 21st week of pregnancy.. well, still i havent gone to the doctor for the ultrasound scanning to find out the gender... my husband and i, we dont really mind that lil one might be..be it girl or boy, we are going to accept it happily...

i have already feeling the sensation of "something in my belly moving around exercising"... slalu gelak sensorang je... the first time, that lil precious kicked me was last week, 18th of october, 2009... takpe laa die blom gi skolah lagi... blom blaja lagi yang tak baik sepak2 mak bapak nih...especially mak laa kan??? haahahaha...tetibe teringat pulak soalan hanan kat mak die...kenapa syurga kat tapak kaki mak??? (soalan tersebut adalah diajukan ketika beliau mengurut kaki maknye)...

btw, my belly is now getting bigger..i only realized it this week..when i first thought there wasnt any big difference in me physically (kata2 orang yg masih lagi belom boleh menerima kenyataan yang beliau sudah beransur buncit)...gambar??? tak nak laa...tunggu kurus baru post sini, ok??

ok laa ..dah tatau nk tulis ape lg nih ....till then bye.... muahhhh :*

memoir: dulu dan sekarang........ selepas 12 tahun.... hahaha



entri ini adalah entri tribute utk en. awak saye...hahaha...dulu dan sekarang...

alkisah, semalam (ahad, 24/10/2009), saya menerima satu "Friend Request" dari Facebook, dari seseorang yang pernah menjadi ustazah saya sewaktu belajar di MRSM Muadzam Shah... dan kebetulan pula, ustazah tersebut merupakan guru homeroom kepada en. awak sewaktu di sana.. Kemudian, en. awak dan saya sama-sama membuka laman facebook ustazah tersebut untuk melihat gambar2 dan mengetahui perkembangan setelah lama tidak berjumpa dengan ustazah ini.... dalam byk2 gambar yang di letakkan ialah gambar homeroom ustazah ni pada thn 1997....di sebabkan gambar tersebut tidak terlalu signifikan dgn saya dan saya merupakan org yg sdg klik next...next..dan next.... maka, waktu utk melihat gambar tersebut tidak laa terlalu lama...akan tetapi, tiba2 kedengaran suara org yang sedang teruja melihat gambar tersebut dan suruh saya berpatah balik ke gambar tersebut.... setelah sampai ke gambar itu semula, en.awak dgn sgt excited dan teruja berkata... "eh, ni gambar saya nih...gambar saya!!!"
hihihi...saya pun perhati kan gambar tersebut lalu berkata... "ooo..ni kire nk tunjuk evidence yg awk penah kurus laa suatu ketika dulu..??" dgn bangganya die berkata, "mesti laaa..well~~"

so this is the picture... approximately 12 years ago...




and this is the latest one...taken during hari raya 2009



**************************************************************

Untuk pengetahuan umum, en.awak saya nih adalah seorang yang sangat laa liat utk diambil gambar..bab2 posing, camwhoring, atau apa2 yang sewaktu dgnnya...beliau adalah sangat tidak berminat dgn itu semua.... tetapi, beliau adalah tidak kisah sekiranya gambar tersebut diambil secara candid... oleh itu, kalau gambar candid, kebiasaannya beliau tak laa sedar dan tak la pandang camera...disebabkan beliau yang seorang nih tak suka bergambar, maka byk lah sejarah hidup beliau tak dapat di rakamkan utk tatapan cucu, cicit piut dan sebagainya.... tetapi kini, beliau bertungkus lumus melayari kembali gambar2 yang di "post" oleh rakan taulan dan sekiranya terdapat gambar dia , maka akan di save kan....supaya dapat mengenang kembali cerita2 lama...

kejadian seterusnya berlaku ketika kami sedang melayari fotopages seorang kenalan en. awak ketika menuntut di U of Minnesota. Mereka pernah pergi fishing trip ke salah satu tasik di sana(yang saya tak tau nama) dan kenalan ini banyak mengambil gambar sepanjang aktiviti memancing berlaku... en. awak saya hanya melihat thumbnail bagi gambar2 itu ,walaupun saya telah mencadangkan agar beliau tengok gambar tu satu demi satu dengan alasan " alaa....saye boleh kenal laaaa gambar saya..." (dengan eksyen nya dia berkata..).. tiba-tiba saya terlihat satu thumbnail yang mcm saya kenal orgnya, lps tu saya pon tunjuk laa dkt dia..

saya : ni awk jugak tak??
awak: tak lah... (dgn muka yg amat confident)
saya : iye...tak caye cube bukak...
(beliau pun bukak laa thumbnail tersebut....)
awak : ntah budak gemok mane ntah nih... ( lalu beliau pun terus save gambar tersebut)

dapat maksudnye??? hahhahahahaha.... saye tak cakap tauuuuuu!!!! this is the picture...


and these are some other pictures that have been saved yesterday...




sekian..terima kasih.....


Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Lucky to be in love......

hohoho..yer, saya faham...tajuk yang agak jiwang.... tapi itu laa hakikatnya sekarang.
Saya berasa amat bertuah kerana akhirnya saya telah menemui "my better half"....

Entri kali ini adalah sekadar ingin mengingatkan diri saya, bahawa saya adalah di kalangan orang-orang yang beruntung....Saya beruntung kerana:

1) Saya dilahirkan dan dibesarkan dalam keluarga yang sempurna... ada ayah, emak, adik beradik etc... tak pernah tak cukup makan ke, tak cukup pakai ke, atau mengalami kesusahan yang terlampau kott..

2) Saya dilahirkan cukup sifat...tak ada cacat cela (jika dinilai dari segi fizikal), perkembangan IQ pun di tahap normal...Di sebabkan itu, alhamdulillah saya telah berjaya menyempurnakan pengajian saya hingga ke tahap Sarjana... (sungguh tak terjangkau dek akal pada mulanya....)

3) Saya telah berkahwin dengan en. awak tanpa menghadapi halangan daripada mana-mana pihak..dan alhamdulillah, setakat ini tiada masalah yang timbul berkaitan keluarga...dan keluarga mertua juga adalah amat best, "warmth" dan byk buat lawak.... pasal en.awak ni plak, thank god he has been very helpful and supportive from the beginning....di kala keadaan yang mcm nih (dimana saya adalh amat flat dan cepat penat dan lain2...) en. awak byk tlg menguruskan kerja2 rumah.. dia tlg gosokkan baju, jemurkan baju, kemas2...even tolong masak sekali...the least i can do is tlg beli bende2 utk dia buka posa ( sebab saye tak pose ) ....bile pk2 sian jgk kat die, tp nk buat cemana....

4) Saya mempunyai pekerjaan yang tetap dan sumber mata pencarian yang halal....

5) Despite of my irregular menstrual cycle, i manage to get pregnant at the early stage of my marriage.


I've been longing to write about this, tapi setiap kali tu lah terasa, biar lah dulu...nnti2 lah! tetapi, selalu terngiang-ngiang di telinga saya perbualan telefon saya bersama Cik Jeeps a.k.a G4.. Saya teringat beliau pernah berkata...

G4 : Peed, ko tak rase beruntung ke, peed???
Me: Nape plak ?
G4: Yelah, cube ko pikir balik.... tahun lepas, waktu macam nih (dah nk dekat pukul 4 ptg masa tu..), ko baru bangun tido (sewaktu saya buat master).... tahun nih, waktu macam nih.... (1) ko dah kawen, (2) ko dah ada kerja, (3) ko pregnant lagi ...
Me : a'ah laa pak... ye tak ye jugak... dah laa period aku pon tak btol kan??
G4: Haaa... Tu lah!!! Orang lain tu takde problem ape2 pun, tp takde rezeki nk dpt anak... Dah laa period tak betul...cyst lagi... so, ko beruntung...
Me : Ye lah pak...kire aku bernasib baik, kan....

At the moment, i was telling her about my newly found cyst-like image during my ultrasound scan ... So, that's how the conversation came about...

So now, the question is, Should i ask for more??

Monday, September 7, 2009

Ramalan mu benar belaka....

Seperti yang diramalkan doktor beberapa entry yang lalu, saya kini disahkan terkena buatan orang lebih 3 bulan..to be exact, 14 weeks... Disebabkan oleh buatan orang ini, saya telah mengalami muntah-muntah yang teruk (sekiranya tak makan dalam jangkamasa yang lama...sebab masuk angin), loya-loya tahap gaban... dan batuk yang agak teruk sehingga boleh menyebabkan saya muntah hijau (errkhhh!!!)... kalau di awal2 dahulu saya masih boleh mengira frekuensi saya muntah, tapi kini saya dah tak larat nak kira..dah lost count....kerana terlalu byk kali saya telah muntah....

Minggu lepas, ketika buatan orang yang saya alami menjangkau 12 minggu, saya telah pergi scan dekat klinik kegemaran saya (yang terletak di Seremban)... dan apa yang membuatkan nafas saya terhenti seketika ialah sewaktu melihat sendiri kewujudan insan lain dalam diri saya..dan ia bergerak!! saya agak kagum...dan segala loya dan sickness (termasuk sakit kepala berpanjangan yang saya alami) bagaikan hilang untuk beberapa saat ...(mungkin kerana kekurangan oksigen disebabkan saya berhenti bernafas)...

Sekarang, saya juga tidak boleh meminum air kosong (seperti juga Amru), kerana ia akan membuat saya bertambah loya dan muntah... di dalam peti ais di rumah saya, mmg telah tersedia air ribena yang telah siap dibancuh... (tak berniat utk promote ribena) tapi mmg air tu je yang saye boleh minum utk menggantikan air kosong... walaupun nurse menyarankan saya agar mengurangkan pengambilan teh, milo dan kopi, saya terpaksa mengambil milo dan teh O juga... mintak maaf ye nurse... supplement pun kadang2 saya makan, kadang2 saya skip mengikut mood adan tahap keloyaan....

mengenai mengidam...saya rasa saya takde laa mengidam benda yang mustahil utk di dapatkan... pada saat ini, tergambar2 di ingatan saya ialah mashed potato di Kenny rogers.. bukan saya tak makan whipped potato KFC yang lebih mudah didapati, tetapi, saya lebih teringatkan yg dkt kenny rogers tu...

Oh ye...mengenai puasa, saya baru sahaja berpuasa selama 4 hari sepanjang bulan puasa ini... disebabkan oleh sebab2 yang dinyatakan seperti di perenggan pertama entri ini... ini bermakna, saya terpaksa mengganti dengan giatnya tahun depan...sob sob sob....

sekian dari saya...terima kasih....

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

sabar itu separuh daripada imannnnnnn.....

Owh..hi encik blog... just droppng by to put on some updates of what's happenning lately..
Lately, i'm so so so...........sloppy...melepek2 tahap ape ntah... my body gets tired easily.... and yesterday, my BP (blood pressure) dropped drastically to 80/45...satu kegilaan tuh kan??? so, i went to klinink amal to see dr. zainon and after several times she checked my blood pressure, she decided to refer me to the GH. so, yesterday was the 2nd time for me kene cucuk masuk air.... my first time was when i were in Mecca to perform the umrah... Luckily, the other night i decided not to follow en. awak balik rawang, kalo tak...sape nk anta g klinik...gi spital....silap2 en. awak suruh pegi keje lagi....

in the evening after everything has settled, my parents and i went to beranang...my mother dah tak senang duduk memikirkan anak cucu die tak mandi lagi...and we slept over... this morning (tuesday) my mother has had her routine appointment, amik darah n all...n tetibe je sedar2 after breakfast habis badan2 ku kene kelegate.....allergic ape laa agaknye...tak penah dibuat...
yang penting skang, kene byk2 sabar......... hummmmmmmm (buat ala2 orang nk bertapa )

babai...

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Argghh!! i'm down with flu...

yerp.. for the past few days (since sunday to be exact), saye demam... at first, i thought it was just another fever, then came the flu in the combo the next day. However, being a very hardworking person, i still went to school on monday and tuesday.. On wednesday morning, i just couldnt open my eyes, my head was too heavy and my body was aching very badly.. so, i decided not to go to work on that morning...

En. awak promised me to come back at 10 a.m, to drive me to see the doctor before he songlaped my en.maxis berukband... after he was off to work, went upstairs to continue sleeping. at about 945 am i woke up, and the headache was still there... around 10 am en. awak arrived, and take me to the clinic at Sg buaya...jauh jugak rupenye sg buaye tu dgn bkt sentosa...the doctor we went to see was the sister to en. awak's classmate in Jasin... rupe2nye, she was expecting us to come, psl adik die dah talipon...isk isk isk.... So, this is just the gist to my convesation eith the doctor....

Doctor : So afidah, ape yang sakit??
Me : owh, demam.. lepas tu badan sakit2 ...
Doctor: ade selesema?
Me : Ade...tp tak laa teruk sgt..ade laa bersin2 sket tapi takde laaa sampai hidung tersumbat terus....
Doctor: Hmmm..... last period bila nih ???
Me : (apekahh??ape kaitan dengan demam nih??) hmmm..awal bulan aritu...
Doctor : Bile tarikh kawen aritu???
Me : (apakah???) 13 june
Doctor : Kene buat pregnancy test dulu nih... baru boleh saye determine ubat ape nak bagi...
Me : (aramakkkk....) **blushing**

Maka, dengan itu terpakse laa saye buat pregnancy test tersebut....dan negative yer kawan2... tetapi masih juga doctor tu kate..hmm, still ade possibility utk ada sbb mungkin takleh detect sbb awal lagi.... btw, tq doctor for giving me MC that day.. (talking abt MC , i need to go to the office and give the MC )

tapi, saye rase laa kan, now is still not a good time for me to have that little creature, because i am still in the phase of adapting and adjusting myself to the new life, new routine etc... There are still a lot to be altered and compromised.

After seeing the doctor, en. awak brought me to a foodstall which he claimed selling " the best sup tulang in the world" .. but to me, sup tu biase laa...sedap laa dari yang biase2..tapi tahap2 kedai sup utara kat s alam tak lebih dari itu... after he sent me home, he taught me how to play his PS2.. psl die takut saye mati kebosanan.... tapi game die adalah sangat tak menarik...kerana main gitar punye game....so, saye adlh sangat tak berminat...

lepas die dah pegi keje balik, i thought of having more sleep for i had to swallowed 3 pills..i felt really tired.. but then, i dont know what got into me, i magically started to clean the house... al maklum laaa rumah orang bujang dulunye...i did the laundry (bercinta btol nk buat dgn mesin basuh nih...tp apekan daye, kang takde baju...), mopped the floor... susun balik sampah2 yang ade that belongs to en.awak (sebab i didnt know which one is important and which one is not) ... If u asked me, i see most of it as sampah je...because they dont look that important to me, because they were stuffed into a plastic bag mcm sampah....mopped tu byk kali tau..ade laa dlm 2 -3 kali jgk..psl the place was like urghhhh...i dont know how to describe... we havent cooked a single meal in the kitchen yet... lps tu, lipat kain... lepas tu jemur kain, lepas tu ubah kedudukan washing machine... then i ironed the clothes for tomorrow (today laa)...kire kat living room dgn dapur tuh dah ok laa... takut ok kalo tibe2 mertua dtg spot check..hahaha...

baiklah..saye rase itu sahaja buat hari ini... tata kawan2...

PS: tq suria!