December 31st, 2008

finally... the year of 2008 is about to leave us in less than 4 hours ( at the moment of typing).. SO i guess this is also a good time for me to re-evaluate myself before making a new-year resolution(s).... (mcm series giler aje kan?)

scanning ............15 %
scanning ............38 %
scanning ............56 %
scanning ............73 %
scanning ............89 %
scanning ............99 %

Scanning Completed!

heh.. as far as i'm concerned, most of my last-year's resolutions achieved (or maybe almost achieving) their goals..

1) to get good results for my master's studies..checked!
2) try to find myself a job..checked !(almost..got one aritu, tp tak pegi..and this one i think, i'll go for it..)
3) *** ******* ** **** ...checked!(almost laa gak sbnrnye)

so, my new years resolution would be:
1) get item (2) and (3) fully achieved ...
2) try to balance everything in my life...
3) complete my master's degree by the end of the year...
4) continuously trying to be a better person...


Bon Voyage 2008 and Welcome 2009... I really hope that this year will be more than just wonderful.. It is hoped that everything will fall into place for me...amin...

Al Fatihah..

Innalillahi wa inna ilaihi rajiun.. di atas kemangkatan Yang di Pertuan Besar Negeri Sembilan.. Semoga Allah mencucuri rahmat ke ata roh beliau..

Member-get- member deal..

seperti yang telah saye jangkakan terjadi... bil telefon saye utk bulan ini adalah melambung dgn amat tinggi...sbb aritu mase kat PD saye gune internet dgn menggunakan tpon sbg modem walaupun hanya dlm mase lebih kurang 1JAM sahaje..(teknologi mmg canggih...tp isk isk isk)...walaupun jumlah penggunaan panggilan hanyalah lebih kurang RM 22 sahaja...poor me!

stressed!

Year end sale!! Malaysia's big saving sale...discounts up to 70%!!!!

haaa...!! amik..terbeliak bijik mate anda sume kan??? oh, tapi seperti biasa, mendung tak bererti hujan....tajuk entri juge tak menggambarkan isinya, begitu juga dgn pepatah omputih, don't judge a book by its cover..

penulisan entri ini bukanlah bermaksud saye sudah membuat pilihan utk persoalan2 hidup yg di paparkan di dlm entri yg sebelumnya..tetapi ini adalah entri tiada kena mengena langsung dgn persoalan tersebut.. entri ini hanyalah bermaksud utk saje2 je...

Pada mlm tadi, saye ada laa berhubung dgn anak buah kedah (kerana arwah pak sedare sulung saye kawen dgn org kedah..dan anak buah ini adlh cucu kpd arwah pak sedare saye nih ..) kami lebih kurang sebaya dan kami lebih senang berhubung melalui instant messaging dan sms, dan mungkin atas sebab kami ni lebih kurang sebaya, kami lebih senang berkomunikasi antara satu dgn lain...

so, nk dipendekkan cerita.. baru2 ni, beliau yang sorang nih cerita laa kat saye yang ade satu konflik keluarga telah berlaku.. lalu saye pun bertanya laa konflik ape?? hehe..die pun jawab, konflik tgh berebut tarikh kenduri kawen pada cuti sekolah bulan 3 nanti...(gimik bukan main..!! konflik tuh..) utk pengetahuan, 3 anak buah kedah saye yg sedang berebut tarikh tu (actually parents diorang laa..anak2 bese tak amik port kot..) 2 daripadanya dah bertunang dan sorang lagi tu potong trip org2 yang dah tunang tuh terus nikah(dah jodoh die dulu, yer tak??)...tp bukan laa sampai bergaduh ke ape..jgn pikir negative tau!! Saye bagi cadangan kat die nih supaye buat je combine..tak payah susah2 rebut tarikh..buat sama2...diorang pun jimat blanja, kite yg nak pegi makan kenduri nih pun jimat jugak..yer tak???(yer la kann.. kene jugak pikir duit minyak, tol, dan blanje2 lain ..[buatnye lepas pegi makan kenduri tuh, nak lajak kan perjalanan ke langkawi ke..padang besar ke..]

So, diorang pun blom bg tau keputusan akhir die mcm mana...kite tunggu dan lihat..

(agak2 laa kan tajuk tuh ade kaitan tak ngn entri???)

of mawi and siti nurhaliza (part 2)

hehe..to cyeda...ramalan mu benar belaka..it is Guru M**A... and the place utk report duty will be T***A Beach Resort in PD..so, you got that one right...

thank you kakngah for the opinion...

today, i received a wake up call from En. R***M...and just what need this time, something that will make this decision making tougher!!! another interesting (i mean really interesting!!) project proposed by my classmate (master's class), En. R***M about an upcoming project for the faculty regarding KM implementation in Malaysia's Automotive Manufacturers .. This project is something we (our class) are planning to leave for the faculty (haha..sentimental!!).. and to do this, i believe that i need to have ample time in my hands to focus on the project...from the explanation i get from en. R***M, it does sound like a big project... Our senior had organized a forum, inviting "big-shots" being the panels doing knowledge sharing session.. so, we thought that we should also leave sth to remember us by.. pastu ade sebut psl buat trip sumer, cari sponsor n all...hahahah ...ai loike!! ( yg tu sbnr nye, yg interesting!!!)

i also asked an opinion from an online friend whom already hold a PhD in something related to datacomm amende ntah..tak pnah tanye in details (in fact, i dont even know his fullname, i just know his YM id)...hehe.. so, he sort of telling me to complete the master first, and the job will always be available ...dont worry about the job...

but still i'm still in dilemma...hahaha...fenin2

terpingga...tertanya...di dalam dilema mu~~ (of mawi and siti nurhaliza)

at last..the result for the previous semester has been out already..and i am happy about it... i'm quite surprise of it actually..tapi biase laa kontrol macho.. and what's more important, it's far better than the previous semester's result.. Thank you Allah... and also those helped me directly and indirectly...

other than that.. now i am facing dilemma between 2 choices... i just got a job offer from a govt statuitory body as a teacher ( i suppose)( and it is also a permanent post, ok!!).. i received notification via sms that asking me to check for the details from the internet.. so i did... why is it i'm torn between 2 choices??? (and that reminds me of "the road not taken")

as everyone knows, currently i'm pursuing my master and i have only 1 semester to go.. and next year, if the news from the TV3, utusan and other news network about the next recession happened to be true, that means less chances for me of getting hired by any company anytime soon..Plus, i'm getting married next year..and currently my financial support comes from FAMA (my father and mother)...

What i needed the most right at this moment is reliable and consistent financial income...but at the same time, i wanted to finish my master (i more semester, remember??) very badly... so, if you were in my shoes, which road do you choose??

which one should i prioritize??? what i need or what i desire/want???
some of you would say, why not just finish my master because my parent will be sponsoring me, inside out...makan, minum, place to stay (currently, i stay alone in a 3 room apartment/flat..all by myself), car...duit jajan n what not...sumer cukup, except for duit shopping and joli katak (usually entertainment sponsored by en.fiance..tapi bukan shopping, only wayang2, dating2, game2 etc sahaje...hehe) tapi utk therapy minda (shopping)nggak ada..jadi tiada joli katak, dan minda juga tidak tenang...

pasal kawen pon, saye rase saye memerlukan sumber kewangan sendiri supaya saye dapat merase sedikit berpuas hati dengan majlis yg akan hanya berlangsung sekali seumur hidup itu, maksud saye, sapekah yg sangat baik hati yg sudi mensponsor majlis kawen saye jadik best macam mawi dan siti nurhaliza??? ade ke?? mesti takde kan?? tapi saye takde laa nak majlis yg grand giler mcm diorang tu, but still i have dreams of my own and i wish to fulfill them satu pon cukup laa kalo tak semua, kan???
And again, mmg la my parents yg akan buatkan majlis tu and all..tapi bile org buatkan, org yg kuar kan duit, the theme most probably will be "back to basics" if you know what i mean...if i wanted to hv opinion/have anything extra..kata2 kena selari dengan duit jugak..mcm kirim barang kat orang laa jugak, kalau pesan dgn air liur, dapatnye air liur jugak..bukan tak bersyukur...tapi, this is once in a lifetime's event..

yg en. fiance ni plak lagi satu...bile suruh die yg sambung master ke apatah lagi phd , banyak je alasan die...tapi beriya-iya nak suruh kite pegi sambung phd terus biar die dpt ikut, pastu kate " ape masalah nye sambung phd??" kalo ade cermin yg boleh pantulkan kata2 tuh pada diri die sendiri kan best (if only...).... as for now, i'm tired of studying (buat mase nih je, esok lusa dah recharge energy, ok laa balik)...penat dah... i felt my brain swelling...

Owh..back to the problem..the thing is, kat website yg announce result psl job offer tu, tak bagi tau pon where will i be posted to, so i get confused whether to accept the offer or not.. kalo die dah bg tau placement kat mane tu takpe jugak..tp nih takde..kalo tau placement bleh laa consider nk pegi ke tak kan???either to take the offer and still do the master ke...the problem is i dont know what to do with my master class...dah nak register dah nih ..org tuh suruh pegi report duty dulu, baru bagitau placement...diorang akan terus suruh report duty kat ade sebuah resort di port dickson dan kat situ baru akan tau ape akan jadi selepas itu..

back to the dilemma, can anybody give me perspectives?????

should i take it or should i not???

what do you think??

vacation mood...

now i'm having sort of vacation in Mayangsari PD... Againn... tp kire ok laa... but this place reminds me of my tesl friends a lot especially the trip we had last year.. Yeah..as Siti said our batch didnt really bond with each other but by having the class trip made me realize that actually we did not really get to know each other in the previous 4 years... my classmates adlh sgt happening and pening at the same time.. hehe!

so now, i started to feel serenity and calm within me.. it's a good thing, isnt it?? haha..maybe it's because the result is not out yet and hey, i'm in no rush...so dont bother to come out just yet.just let me enjoy this zen-like feeling for little more longer, enjoy sleeping soundly every night...hmmm...bestnye! it's like i have nothing to worry about and i'm loving it!!

owh ye..lupe plak nk bgtau..skang nih saye berada di PD nih bersama2 mak ayah saye dan bangah dan kakngah dan hanan dan zara dan umar dan of kos awoo...diorang tido lagi kot..i slept early last night, around 1030 kot..and woke up around 3 am and could not sleep anymore.. so i decided to surf the internet using my phone as the modem (abes laa bil gue..) for like an hour or so...then i watched 3 episodes of Private practice season 2 downloaded last week..After subuh, i went to the lobby to use the wireless service... Owh ye jugak lagi, misti ramai yg tertanya2 ttg keberadaan maxis broadband saye tuh kan??? modem tersebut berada di tangan en. fiance kerana saye sedang bercuti di rumah dan ade en. streamyx...saje sian tgk die kebosanan... hmm tu laa, nk wat cmane lagik kan...daripada gelap tadi, ni dah terang benderang dah nih..

Ok laa..nk naik la dah..tgk kanak2 tu dh bgn ke blom... orait....tatalll

Official entry

Last saturday, i am officially engaged to en.bf. Therefore from now on, i should address him as en. fiance...rase kelakar laa pulak.. ooopps sorry, tergedik seketika... abes laa, since my sisters (including in-law[s]) and my cousin[s], are part of the readers of this blog...kang kantoi laa plak saye seorang yang gedik *blushing* hahaha... so, for this entry, i think i would just briefly describe one of the events in my life, and that is of course laa about the engagement day... it's not that i felt like the event wasnt important in my life but somehow i just couldnt really "feel" it...i'm happy but it's just takde "feel" laa... i dont know what's the reason(s) behind it, but.. you tell me!
(1) To some of you that have read the announcement (yang skang nih saye dah hide kan entry tersebut atas sebab2 tertentu), you would know that my make up artist wasnt here, and that makes 2 of my sisters were not here during the event...
(2) my en. fiance pun tak datang pada hari kejadian, di sebabkan oleh perintah larangan daripada ibundanya...so, sbg anak yg THO'AT (sebut seperti bahase arab ye), make die pun menurut perintah..
(3) lepas tu mase time2 org(sebelah) nak amik gambar dgn star of the day nih, tetibe laa plak one of my nieces , yaya came to me and said something like "tuyaa" repeatedly and at the same time pull my hand..ntah ajak gi mane ntah...tp tak dapek laa den nak ngikut doh...dah laa pelat lagi..so tak tau laa ape yg die nk ckp sbnrnye...tp comel! hehehe...tp dh hilang feel sket nk amik gambar posing2...
(4) lagi satu, the whole day, i didnt feel nervous at all....i mean even mase nk gi konvokesyen pun rase nervous bagai nak gile...pastu kalo time nk kne g interview, siap takleh tido lagi.... ini, agak nyenyak laa jugak sehingga waktu dikejutkan...tido baekkkk punye!takde rase berdebar2 la pendek katenye...
(5) none of my friend is coming. tp yer laa, i just invited kawan skolah rendah, which are majority area seremban laa...bukan tanak ajak org2 tesl, asasi ke ape...tanak menyusahkan korang je ...

and there were also interesting stories (at least to me) that happened that day while i was putting on my own make up (sob sob ..for doing my own make up..)...
(1) one of my cousin's daughter, decades older than me tumpang mandi in my bathroom, n then after seeing me putting make up by myself (note: i was alone in that room earlier), she asked,
Cousin's Daughter: make up sendiri ke dik???
me: (saje buat muke kunun cam sedih) a'aa..siann kene make up sendiri...make up artist takde..
Cousin's Daughter: takpe2 jap lagi ******* tolong mekap kan lepas mandi nih...
me: (OMG!!!!!) lantas selepas je die masuk bilik air,

maka saya dgn sepantas halilintar menyiapkan makeup saye sehingga habes....cuma tak sempat pakai lipstick je... tgk2 die kuar bilik air saye dah siap...hehehe ..dlm hati tuh, nasib baik sempat siapp...hehehe..saje je tanak nyusahkan org lain utk mekapkan...hehehe :P (note for saksik: kakcik, blusher die same laa ngan awak !!! hehehehe) itu pun,mase pakai lipstick nih, saye telah dicadangkan oleh mekap artis saye utk pakai kaler yg tak laa merah cam makngah..so, after saye pakai lipstick tu org tuh komen lipstick saye pucat..so, utk menjaga ati, saye pun pakai laa merah sket...tp tuh pun cam pink sketttt je...

(2) one of my mom's anak buah (umur dah warga emas laaa) dulu (menurut pemahaman saye sblm hari kejadian) ckp kat mak psl anak kwn die(lelaki) tak kawen lagi n nk dicarikkan laa spouse utk anak lelaki kwn die...so, i tot mule2nye die suruh mak carik kan kot2 org taman guru nih ade sape2 anak pompuannye cikgu dan tak kawen lagi...rupe2nye pada awal alkisahnye die adalah bertanye kpd mak saye mengenai perihal saye utk dikenenkan dgn anak lelaki kwn nye itu... saye amat bernasib baik kerana beberapa tahun yg lepas, ketika saya mengikuti satu rombongan menghantar cincin tunang di Serting, i have had a conversation with my mother, and conversation tu lebih kurang camnih laa :
Me: mak, org yang tunang nih, die carik sendiri ke orang yg carikkan??(fyi: i like to ask this kind of question to my mother..haha...kepoci)
Mak: Abang die yang runding kan...nape plak??
Me: ooo..takde ape..tapikan nanti kan adik TANAK camtuh tauu....

SO, i reckoned my mother still remember that conversation or maybe because i have invited en. fiance formerly known as en.bf to meet my parents....So, instead of me, she suggested our neighbour's daughter...lucky me... Overall, the event went well if not very well... (since u know, most of the time i was in my room..hehe, saye nih kan pemalu..) about the hantaran i received, there was no problem at all to finish all the cake, chocolates, and fruits..because i have lots and lots of relatives, anak buahs and what not...even before i opened the gifts, i noticed some of their eyes (especially the kids) were on the gifts especially the cake and the chocolate...so, dlm mase yg amat sekejap, bende2 tu abes.. So that's about it...that’s about the day.... and i’ll just put a few pictures...

this is the simplest design of sireh junjung that i could find in old collection of magazines....that tall thing is candle ok!!



the hantaran i got

this is me after the "sarung cincin". the one in tudung labuh is my en. fiance's maklong and the one with yellow tudung/hijab is my soon to be mother in-law....(alamak..nervous tuh delayed laa..baru sampai....)


thanks a lot to my sister in-laws for helping me out with the hantaran....

haaa...kan dah kantoi!!!!

alhamdulillah, my father gets better every day.. and i'm thankful...

haha...i thought that the readers of my blog are just my tesl friends and ex-schoolmate... rupa2nye udah ramai yg tau...hua hua hua... cemane nih???my camouflage as Miss Nugget tidak lagik berkesan di kala ini.... oleh itu, saye kne kontrol ayu sket.... (",) hehehe..

tu laaa.. kan dah kantoi!

a gloomy one....

what has been planned earlier was that today we (my parents and i- since i am the official driver to my folks during the holiday) were supposed to go to Felda Sg. Lui (2-hour drive from Seremban) to a family gathering of my late aunt. My father insisted on going to this particular event, because at first they planned to hold the kenduri on the 29th but unfortunately one of my neighbour was going to have a wedding ceremony for her first daughter and, and since our house is very near we were obligated to help out and attend the wedding.. Since my father informed my cousins that he couldnt make it on the 29th, they were more than happy to switch the date to the 30th as long as my father could come to the kenduri (since my father is the only uncle they have left in the family..please note that my father is now 71 years old, and the last born in his family).

What happen this morning was suddenly my father could hardly walk by himself and needed a tongkat to walk (but still, i just cant believe that my father jalan pun mcm goyang sangat2, so fragile that even kalo jentik sikit pun boleh tumbang dah. seriously, i'm not exaggerating). I mean, last night he was just fine, driving to another kenduri held by a relative as well. But i dont know what went wrong, this morning he was not that good at all.. what i'm sure of is he wasnt miss his regular medication the previous night. This morning, all the joints (my father's) were aching badly , and my father can hardly walk...

At first, my sister suspected that he was infected by the new aedes disease, Chiku hape bende ntah...but after i brought my father to the general hospital, the doctor said that the disease takde laa mcm tu, however if after 3 days, the illlness become worse and if ade nmpk bintat2 merah2 kat kuli, then confirm laa bende chiku ntah hape ntah tu (hopefully tak..). And i asked the doctor if it's psoriatic arthritis, because my father has history of psoriasis..and from my reading, the disease could lead to joints inflammation.. then the doctor ckp tak jugak, and i was a little bit relief laa..tp still di selubungi misteri ...penyakit ape yg tetibe datang mcm tu aje, yer tak???

So, instead of going to the family gathering, we were heading to the general hospital laa kan....
pastu after dah balik rumah (at first, i thought that my father was going to be admitted[and we were ready to bring over some clothes and what not]- i mean, it would be good because in hospital there will be a lot of medical facilities and help in case anything happen-i'm not hoping that anything bad will happen, just to be prepared), i would run as fast as i could if i hear things fall to the floor to check on my father if he's ok, i would also run if i hear him "mengerang" to asking him if he needs anything, if i see him walking i will escort him from the back, to make sure where he's going do whatever he needs to do and escort him back to his room.. he wouldnt let me to "papah" him to his destination, so, escorting is what i could do to make sure he's ok .. it's frightening of the possibilities that could happen and i dont want to think about that at all.. all i know is that i'm extremely worried if anything happen to my father... i am just not ready... Ya Allah, please heal my father....


I dont know about how you would feel if your father suddenly tak terdaya nk jalan...but what i felt after twice seeing my father was so sick ( one, after he was having the bypass surgery, and this is the second time) oooppss..this is the third time, the second time was when he was down disebabkan oleh kayap kat kepala... i felt extremely worried and sedih jugak psl sumer orang pon tau, father figure ni once was orang yg paling kuat dlm family kite, one who suppose to protect our family at all time...suddenly i felt insecure, psychologically...bukan laa bermaksud die tak kuat nih i would be unprotected tapi insecure in terms of i'm not ready facing any loss... if you know what i mean... i dont know if i put it right in the exact words (sorry for any wrong interpretation), but that's how i feel... insecure..frightened..not ready...

so, now, i'm truly worried....please pray for my father.....